i always forget guys have bellybuttons
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
Randomize
