We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
OPIZZABONMYDICK
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
Randomize
