i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
Randomize
