I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
You told my mother that her salad dressing tasted like semen.
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
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