when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
Randomize
