I must be too annoying 4 u.
We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Randomize
