After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
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