I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
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