its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
