im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
Randomize
