how hairy? two words: wookie tits
mike has just informed me of all the things he would put in his pussy if he was a woman. this includes door stops, power drills & g.i. joes.
"and then my dad would be all like 'hey mike, where's the remote?'"
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Randomize
