You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
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