there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
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