Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
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