chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
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