i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
Randomize