We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
