Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
we should paint friendship bongs
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
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