did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
In my next life I better get to be a bird. Fuck flying. I'm gonna shit on your car. Every. Day.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
Randomize
