# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
And then the night went full on bisexual.
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
Randomize
