He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
