Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
We walked through the hotel lobby in slow-mo taking huge steps because we were astronauts, and astronauts obviously can't be drunk.
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
Randomize
