shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
splinters make it hard to masturbate
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
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