I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
farters have to be the big spoon...
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
Randomize
