It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
Randomize
