home. puking in laundry basket.
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
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