You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
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