you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
At the ER, will you come pick me up... Had an allergic reaction, wanted to see if I could eat a peanut without dying... Do you how bad this is evolutionary, I would have died back in the days of survival of the fitest by now
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
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