It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
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