White coat. Heels.
In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
see... this is why i put birth control in all my friends drinks
wait.... you do what?
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
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