i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
Randomize
