ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
How many of my Tinder dates can my Christian roommate accidentally meet in the hallway at 3am before she's horrified and moves out?
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
Randomize
