Got home from the bar at 4am. 100% sober, unlaid. Epic fail or responsible behavior?
Responsible fail?
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
Randomize
