we're blogging at a bar
You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
Randomize
