We're like a lot better than the average bears
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
Randomize
