We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
Randomize
