I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
Randomize