The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
