I'm jealous of your bromance
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
our cab driver is having phone sex.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
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