I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
I don't think brook has ever known best
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
God I need to hump something, right now.
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
Randomize
