how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
You know you suck at relationships when you are sitting in the airport on Christmas day, alone, swiping on Tinder.
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Randomize
