Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
[insert really romantic bullshit about how much i love you and how beautiful you are so you will suck my dick tonight]
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize
