Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
Why do I feel like that's not the first time you've drank champagne with someone dressed as a unicorn?
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
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