i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
Randomize
