I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
Randomize
