So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
Randomize
