Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
Randomize
