The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
Got laid last night using the intro line of "rate your hurricane evacuation plan on a scale of 1-10"
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize
