I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize
