dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
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